Rethinking the Drama Triangle — How Internal Roles Become External Patterns

AS WITHIN, SO WITHOUT. AS ABOVE, SO BELOW.

There’s a conflict model by Karpman that names three drama roles: Persecutor, Victim, Rescuer. It explains conflict between people. But there’s another version — one I see in coaching, and in myself. It doesn’t happen between people. It happens inside. I call it the Internal Drama Triangle, and it is how internal roles become external patterns.

You can’t live off the triangle in your relationships if you’re still on it in your own mind. “As above, so below. As within, so without. As the universe, so the soul.” According to the Emerald Tablet. Can't argue with that. That’s the pattern. What turns inside, shows outside.

A bad-day loop:

I get into bed and tell myself: “I didn’t do enough today. I should have trained harder. I should have eaten better. I should have done more.”

(Persecutor)

Then I feel sorry for myself: “Poor me. I tried so hard. No one helped. The world is against me.”

(Victim)

Then I rescue myself: “It’s not you. It’s everything else. Just eat the chocolate. Watch some TV. You deserve it.”

(Rescuer)

And the moment I’ve done that, I’m back to punishing myself: “You see what I mean? You’re lazy. This is exactly why you’re a loser.”

(Persecutor again)

We move through these roles without realising it. This is violence against yourself.

Strangely, the Persecutor often gives us the exit — not by helping, but by becoming unbearable. That’s when you finally see the pattern for what it is.

Put the whip down! Stop punishing yourself. Only then can the shift begin.

David Emerald’s Empowerment Dynamic shows the path forward:

Victim → Creator

Persecutor → Challenger

Rescuer → Coach

Aldous Huxley wrote: “It’s a little embarrassing that after 45 years of research and study, the best advice I can give people is to be a little kinder to each other.”

And that kindness starts with you.